How to Encourage Your Child When They Feel Left Out: A Devotion for Raising Confident Kids

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A real devotion for moms raising confident kids through hard seasons. Learn how to encourage your child when they feel left out, unseen, or overlooked—and remind them where their true identity is found.

“The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”
—1 Samuel 16:7 (NLT)

What to Do When Your Child Feels Left Out

We’re a football family. Daron played. Ethan played. And when Easton said he wanted to play, I was nervous, but we said yes. Watching him suit up for his first sixth-grade season was like watching something come alive inside him. He was the kicker, the running back, on defense—you name it, he did it. And he shined.

It was one of those seasons where your kid finds their confidence—and you, as a parent, get a front row seat to watch it bloom.

But then came middle school. And everything changed.

Raising Confident Kids in a Performance-Driven World

We joined a new school and a new team and a new football program. Easton was excited—hopeful for another great year. But it didn’t play out the same way. Seventh grade came and went with hardly any playing time. He stood on the sidelines week after week.

The same boy who once soared on the field now questioned if he should even play again. And as his mom, I could see it: the discouragement, the loss of joy, the shift in how he saw himself.

Everything in me wanted to march down and make it right. But I knew this wasn’t my battle to fight. It was my opportunity to parent his heart.

How to Encourage Your Child During Hard Seasons

Instead of fixing it, I leaned in and I reminded Easton of this truth: You are not what you do. Your value isn’t found in playing time. It’s found in who God says you are.

I encouraged him to keep showing up—not to prove something, but because he loves the game. I challenged him to be a team player. To cheer on the others and to keep learning. I reminded him that this could be a time to build strength in what feels like an off-season.

Because sometimes, the sidelines aren’t punishment—they’re preparation.

A Devotion for Moms Trying Their Best

These middle school years are tough—for kids and for us moms. Their confidence is fragile. Their identity is forming. And we get to help shape what they believe about themselves.

Even when it’s hard—when our hearts break for them and we don’t understand the “why” behind the season they’re walking through—we can trust that God is still at work.

But I believe this with all my heart: God sees what we can’t. He’s building something deeper. And if we stay present and prayerful, we’ll raise kids who know how to stand tall—even when they feel small.

Prayer to Help Encourage Your Child During Tough Seasons:

Lord, thank You for trusting me to be a mother. Help me love my children well through the highs and the lows. When they feel left out or unseen, remind them—and me—that You see their hearts. Help me to speak life, truth, and purpose into them, even when the world doesn’t. Build their confidence on the foundation of who You say they are. Amen.

Activation: How to Encourage Your Child with this Simple Step

Take 5 minutes to speak life over your child today. Look them in the eyes and say something that affirms who they are—outside of their performance. Write a note. Whisper a prayer over them as they sleep. Let them know they are seen, valued, and deeply loved.

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